Feelings Tuesday, August 04, 2009

I can't stand it when I get into these funks. Everything is changing and I can't control it. I don't like the changes and it is upsetting me. I'm not responsible for the changes, but I have this insatiable need to fix them because they are breaking things that I have loved. I can't fix them because they are not my problems to fix and that hurts me a lot. I never thought I was a fixer, but I guess deep down, I really am. I'm sad and there is no way to make it all better right now. I'll just be sitting here with my hurt feelings watching all the other hurt feelings and seeing things become broken and I'm so very sad. My happy home isn't happy anymore and I'm losing control of what little I could control. Maybe it's time to find a new happy home. These are all just feelings and thoughts that have become overwhelming to me. I need to step back and evaluate where it all is taking me and see if that is really where I want to be.